Tofu McMuffins

Sure, being a vegan means being healthy. It means raw fruits and vegetables and whole grains cooked in vegetable broth. It means nutrition and treating your body like a temple. However, some mornings, usually after a night of drinking, your body feels more like a temple of doom. You are hung over and feel awful and just want something heavy and greasy in your stomach. I used to rely on egg McMuffins from McDonalds to fill this void in my life. After a rough night, there was nothing I craved more than a delicious fried egg covered in gooey cheese and served on an english muffin. I could pair it with 1 or 2 (OK, usually 2) hashbrowns and some orange juice from concentrate (you know, to be healthy). What the hell was I thinking ?!?!?
It's one thing to want something salty and carb-laden, but an egg McMuffin is a cholesterol, fat, cruelty circus that is too much for me to even contemplate now. It all goes back to my blog's tagline, that there are no bad foods, just bad ingredients. This became my mantra as I set about making my own animal-free breakfast sandwich. It's not the healthiest breakfast ever, but it comes in at around 300 calories instead of 600 or whatever is in those little yellow wrappers of death. Let's face it, if this is going to be your breakfast, there's a good chance that you spent the night before doing some damage to your body. Just because you feel like crap doesn't mean you should eat crap. So, the next time that you get a little boozy, try this as your hangover cure-all along with a cup of strong black coffee.

Editor's note: It has been pointed out to me by my incredibly talented, intelligent, good-looking, scrunchie-wearing, meat-aterian, co-worker that a McDonald's egg McMuffin only has 300 calories, and a sausage egg mcMuffin has 450. Since mine comes in at just under 300, your real savings are not caloric, but rather fat, cholesterol, and karmic.



Tofu McMuffin

• 3 oz. square of tofu, rinsed and drained and dredged in cornstarch
• garlic powder
• salt
• fresh ground black pepper
• vegan cheese
• 1/2 tbsp. earth balance
• english muffin

Start by heating your pan over medium heat while you pop the english muffin into the toaster.
Sprinkle both sides of your tofu square with garlic powder, salt, and pepper.
When the pan is hot, coat it with nonstick cooking spray and drop the tofu in, cooking it for about 2 minutes on each side, or until you get a nice golden brown color.
Take your now-toasted english muffin out of the toaster and butter both halves with the earth balance. Place the warm tofu square on the english muffin and top with vegan cheese. I used the cheddar daiya and it changed my life.