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Chickpea Cutlets

There is nothing sexier than when a man knows his way around the kitchen. Historically, young girls were encouraged to learn how to cook assuming that one day they would find themselves in the position of a housewife. We were encouraged with old adages such as "the way to his heart is through his stomach". The signals were clear: cooking is a womanly art and one we must master if we ever want to find true domestic bliss.
Those girls had it easy.
Nowadays, young women have to be everything. We're expected to be good at our jobs and follow our killer instincts at work. We're expected to know how to do all of the traditional "girl stuff". We're also expected to be impossibly thin and are constantly bombarded with images of women who are unrealistically beautiful. You can't stand in line at the grocery store without being confronted by seven different images of women whose job it is to be beautiful and who are  buffed, waxed, polished, and airbrushed within an inch of their lives, all to bring you the latest edition of Cosmo or Marie Claire.
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love cooking. I find something incredibly soothing about starting with the most basic building blocks of a meal(vegetables, grains, and spices) and crafting them into something bigger, better, and more delicious than the sum of their parts. I take comfort in knowing that if I follow the correct steps, I'm going to end up with something wonderful. I love setting the table and watching people dig in to meals I have prepared. I live for the look on their faces as they savor something really delicious.
On the other hand, life can get pretty tough.  Day in and day out, I go to work, I deal with people, I manage things, I dot my i's and cross my t's. Then I go to the gym where I sweat needlessly (which I hate) so that I can make up for the time that I spent sitting at my desk, because humans weren't designed to sit at desks anyway. At the end of a long day, there is nothing better than sitting down to a meal that someone else has prepared. The only thing that makes it better is if the chef of said meal happens to also be funny and sweet and incredibly amazing. Needless to say, I was very excited when my boyfriend put together chickpea cutlets in a lemon-caper sauce.

Karyn's Kitchen in Chicago

Dear readers, I hope that none of you are under the impression that my Mis-Adventures are in any way limited to the kitchen. On the contrary, I find disasters happy accidents at every turn. Case in point: my boyfriend and I were on a trip when our plane was grounded for 2 hours outside of Chicago. The official reason given to us by United Airlines was that there were weather delays and flights were delayed in and out of Chicago. Wrong. Flights were delayed by fifteen minutes and our plane didn't have enough fuel to circle. As if being stranded on a runway for 2 hours wasn't enough, United was unable to put us on another flight that day. A very rude and unhelpful customer service agent did get us seats on a plane the next morning. but that left the two of us in Chicago for the night.
Always ready to make lemons out of lemonade, we got a room in downtown Chicago and I set about the business of happy cow'ing a dinner venue. I happened upon a chain of restaurants in Chicago: Karyn's On Green, Karyn's Cooked, and Karyn's Raw. We were staying walking distance from Karyn's Cooked and more than happy to make the trek in eight-thousand degree Chicago weather (with 99% humidity). OK, maybe I wasn't thrilled to make the trek, but when we got to the hippest, trendiest vegan restaurant I have ever been in, my mood instantly lightened.
Here is my theory: Chicago is a big foodie town, and to compete, Karyn and her staff have to maintain a certain level of service, excellence, and delicious food. The restaurant was entirely vegan and the service was warm and friendly (unlike some places in Los Angeles where the wait staff is stiff and not a little bit rude)
After salivating over the menu (remember we had been stuck on a plane all day),  we started off our meal with delicious "buffalo" wings. They were so delicious that we had made it halfway through the plate before it occurred to me that I might want to take a picture.
I followed this course with one of the most amazing bowls of pasta I have ever had in my entire life. While I'm sure that my hunger had something to do with it, it really was exceptional. Pasta was tossed with spinach, mushrooms, broccoli, and a healthy dose of olive oil. Sitting here writing about it is making me hungry. I will say that the bread was not the best of my life, but I didn't really expect it to be. While we were eating, Karyn herself made a stop in and dropped off some flyers at our table. She was awesome, super-skinny, and tanned within an inch of her life. Not many women can pull it off like Karyn can.
After dinner, and even though I wasn't really THAT hungry, we splurged and ordered some chocolate cake with vegan ice cream on the side. My boyfriend wisely reasoned that we weren't going to have another opportunity for vegan cake for the next couple of days, and I decided to accept his premise and his conclusion. The cake was great, but nothing compared to that amazing pasta. I really should try to recreate it on my own.

Anyway, thank you Karyn and company, for making two out of place vegans feel welcome in the windy city. 

http://www.karynraw.com/

Spring Rolls

I really was super-excited to make spring rolls with a peanut dipping sauce. The main reason why I was so excited was that I got to make a trip to Mitsuwa, Mitsuwa is none other than the largest Japanese supermarket in the West, and it is also right down the street from my new house. Walking into Mitsuwa, I imagined finding tons of hidden vegan jewels and walking out with a full cart. Instead, I left shell-shocked, bewildered, and generally shaken, but with spring roll wrappers.
It was very, very strange to be in a store where I literally could not read the labels. Most of them had english on the back, but it was so tiny and indecipherabl, that I was not really sure of what went in anything. I perused the produce section, which had so many umeboshi products that a macrobiotatian would have thought they had died and gone to heaven. On the other hand, I do not much care for umeboshi after a particularly nasty incident with a weight-loss tea consisting of umeboshi, daikon, carrot, and (wait for it) soy sauce. Surprisingly, it was not as good as it sounds.
Back to my trip. I wandered shell-shocked up and down the aisles, occasionally picking up funny-looking boxes and straining to read the ingredients. Definitely NOT vegan-friendly. Even the breads seemed to all have either milk or butter in them. I'm sure I would have had more luck if I had gone with someone more familiar with the cuisine or the language. Fortunately, I did make it out in one piece and with my spring roll wrappers. I got home and was very excited to make my peanut dipping sauce with fresh peanut butter from the Whole Foods. Unfortunately, the peanut butter had some hard, grainy substance in it. Now, I was never emo enough to eat broken glass (I just walk on it), but if I had, this is what I imagine it would have been like.  I was very much into these spring rolls when we had them for dinner, and very much not into them the next day. So the lesson there is that they do not keep well. The other lesson is that Whole Foods puts plastic or something in their fresh-ground peanut butter, or at least they did that day.

Granola Bars

Only 2 days through my now-infamous McDougall week, I caved. My stomach was demanding a mid-afternoon snack, and I got caught at work without access to suitable food. The next thing I knew my legs had carried me to the vending machine. I don't remember buying it, but somehow 85 cents ended up in the machine and a granola bar ended up in my hand. It was like magic, I swear. I was probably possessed.
I didn't actually feel bad about caving, but it was not something I wanted to repeat. Thus, it became critical to find an oil-free granola bar. I know that a l'arabar would have been acceptable, but they charge a buck sixty for those things, and they are pretty much mashed up dates. They are delicious and good in a pinch, but they are not what I would consider a granola bar.
A granola bar should have, well,  granola in it. However, granola is chock full of fat, so I had to go to the source: the oat. Oats are just as good as granola; they just haven't been toasted with a lot of oil and sugar. In a way, it's granola in it's natural habitat. I perused the McDougall forums and found a recipe that looked promising, except it was missing a very key ingredient: carob chips. I understand that I probably screwed up the entire "no-oil" guideline by the addition of these sweet little darlings, but they made my granola bars something like ten thousand times as delicious. Plus, even with a couple of carob chips, these were much better for me than anything that ever came out of a vending machine.

Meetup Group

I am conducting a little social experiment with the folks over at meetup.com. In my social experiment, I have created a meetup group for people who are looking for friends. Let's face it, people are busy with work and school and families, and it doesn't leave much time for making friends. Most of my friends from college have abandoned me moved to NYC.
It's not that I'm friendless, persay. I have lots of friends on the east side (I'm huge in Silverlake, I promise). I have friends from work, I attend regular meetups. I just think it would be fun to crowd-source friend-making and see what turns up. Maybe it will be a bunch of weirdos. Maybe it won't.
Anyway, if you would like to join, here is the link: Super Best Friends Club

Alternative Pizza

Sometimes I get to share my great successes with my readers, and sometimes I feel the need to own up to my mistakes. The following is an account of a pizza gone wrong:

During the week that I stuck to the McDougall plan, I decided to play around with their concept of replacing the cheese on pizza with hummus. It seemingly makes sense, hummus is delicious, oil-free, and easily spreadable. My pesto recipe is also oil-free, delicious, and easily spreadable. Throw either one of them on top of a pizza crust, top with vegetables, and you're in business. Or so I thought.
My first mistake was in the cornerstone of any good pizza: the dough. A good pizza dough is made of yeast, flour, and water. It only uses olive oil to coat the bowl it rises in and prevent sticking. This adds a negligible amount of oil to the recipe, and I should have just accepted it and moved on with my pizza making. Instead, I allowed myself to be seduced by the novel idea of crafting a pizza crust out of whole wheat pastry flour and beer. Yes that's right, beer-crust pizza. It sounds like a great idea, because the two usually make for an excellent pairing. On this particular occasion though, the two did NOT go together. The crust was hard without being cooked through and lacked any flavor whatsoever. Fail.
The second shortcoming of said pizza was in the lack of cheese. The hummus and pesto would have been ok, if I hadn't cooked them within an inch of their life while waiting for the beer dough to solidify and the vegetable toppings to cook. In the future, I would probably pre-cook my veggies and crust, so that I didn't inadvertently suck all the moisture out of the sauce.
The final shortcoming of these pizzas came in the form of the Most Cursed Vegetable. I'm talking about the artichoke. I did my internet research. I trimmed the leaves. I steamed it with lemon. I ended up with a purple-tinged artichoke heart. Now I've never worked with fresh artichoke before, but purple food is just weird. I learned a very important lesson, however. That lesson is to never try to cook fresh artichokes, because I will end up with a mess of purple leaves and very weird pizza.
We ate it anyway.

The Proof is in the Pudding

A few weeks ago, my boyfriend and I were at Urth Cafe in Santa Monica, waiting in an extremely long line for the privilege of paying $6 for a cup of coffee (which we gladly do, because it's worth it). The line takes you past a very full and very delicious looking pastry case full of non-vegan baked goods. Now don't get me wrong, Urth does a decent job of having some vegan options. However, their vegan cookies taste like cardboard ground into dust and then stuck back together with glue. Even though I know they don't taste good, I sometimes end up with one of these cookies to quell the cravings brought on by that hellish pastry case. If I thought that I could get away with it, I would certainly bring my own delicious dessert to accompany what has to be the most perfect latte in the universe.
That particular time, I happened to notice a bread pudding. OK, I was probably staring at that bread pudding the way a Manhatten Socialite eyes the jewelry counter at Harry Winston's. Logically, I recognized that that bread pudding was full of butter and cream which were produced at the expense of baby animals everywhere. On the other hand, my mouth was telling me I was hungry. I decided to do what I always do, which is put together my own vegan version of said bread pudding.

Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal

OK I guess that I have to live up to it. After a very successful first week on the McDougall plan, I fell of the wagon. In spite of my McDougallings, my body started retaining water like crazy(more on that personal issue later, I promise). I quickly grew frustrated with my body. It was a lot of work to avoid ALL oils, and going through that trouble without seeing any results was a disheartening experience. I just had to give up the McDougall plan for the time being, with the intention of returning to it.
Of course there is one major exception, and that is that I continue to cut back on oil when I cook at home. By eliminating some of the empty calories that were coming from oils, I've been able to work in more whole grains. They're full of fiber and really do help control your appetite. Last week, I made some delicious oatmeal for breakfast. The recipe serves two, so you can either find a breakfast partner or save half for the following day. It tastes just as good re-heated, so I give this recipe a D for delicious.

 Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal

• 2 cups apple juice
• 1.25 cups oats
• 1 apple, cubed
• 2 tbsp raisins
• 2 tsp brown sugar
• 1tbsp cinnamon 

Bring the apple juice and cinnamon to a boil over medium heat. Add the oats and cook for 5 minutes, or until the liquid disappears. Add the cubed apples and stir. Sprinkle with raisins and brown sugar.

A Little Help from My Friend Amy

So yes, it is always good to make your own chocolate cake with applesauce and cocoa powder, and the end result is always something deliciously low in fat and almost good for you. On the other hand, sometimes you are willing to take a break from your diet and are looking for something delicious to round out a low-fat dinner. Last night, I had a failed attempt at gnocchi. I'm not sure what really went wrong, but the end result was a lumpy, sticky potato-mush on the counter. The upside was that I was ready with brown rice pasta as a backup, which ended up going very well with my oil-free vegan pesto. Since we started the meal with a tomato bruschetta (which used a very teensy teaspoon of olive oil), I felt more than justified in taking a major shortcut with dessert.
Cue Amy's. for those of you not in the know, Amy's is a brand that produces natural, organic packaged foods, which are largely available in the frozen section of grocery stores. Even Ralph's carries Amy's products. Yesterday, I was at Whole Foods trying to improvise a dessert. We were in the frozen section, checking out a selection of raw gelato and ice cream. After checking the ingredients on the raw ice cream, I realized that it had just as much oil as any other dessert. and I reasoned that if I was going to break the McDougall plan, I was going to do it for something I knew would be delicious. Cue the improvisation. I debated the idea of baking a lemon-poppy seed cake and wrestled with the notion of baklava. I was considering a lemon tart when, like a shining beacon of hope, Amy's frozen cakes jumped out at me. I originally went for the lemon poppy seed, but it was not vegan. Our choices were limited to orange or chocolate, and the boyfriend made the right choice with the chocolate. I also snagged a bag of Whole Food's frozen berry medley, making this quite possibly the easiest dessert ever created. As a bonus, it was also delicious.

Wine pairing: an entire bottle of Almond Creek Champagne :)

Breakfast Bran Muffins

One of the many diet books that I have consulted over the years was the Fat Smash Diet. Yes, that's right, it's written by Dr. Ian from VH1's Celebrity Fit Club. He actually has a degree from Harvard, so I felt comfortable listening to his advice. Unfortunately, that diet was hard to maintain and I came upon it before I really discovered willpower. However, the one thing that always stuck with me was how much Dr. Ian loathed muffins. He would have taken every muffin from every coffee shop and bakery in America, rounded them up, and marched them to their deaths. Why?
Because muffins are totally bad for you. Starbuck's Apple Bran muffin has 470 calories. It's a bran muffin! It's supposed to be healthy, or so one would think. Wash that sucker down with a frappuccino, and your breakfast has 800 calories in it. To give you some perspective, my caloric intake is somewhere around 1800 a day to maintain my weight. So, I could have that "healthy" muffin and some sugary syrupy goodness, but what would I do about the rest of my day?
Now, I wouldn't actually ever eat a Starbuck's bran muffin, because it has little baby animals in it, and I do not eat little baby animals. That whole rant was just a hypothetical exercise. Anyway, since regular muffins are so unhealthy, and since I decided to try out the McDougall plan for a week, here is a decent recipe for oil-free bran muffins. They're very dense and chewy, and it is my experience that one is more than enough for a filling breakfast.
Disclaimer: It's not the most delicious muffin ever, but If you are looking for non-fat recipes, than this is the way to go.

Oil-Free French Toast

Wow, or as the French would say, Oo-la-la. I am a girl who loves sweet foods for breakfast. However, when I think of French Toast I can't help but feel a little guilty thinking about all of the fat involved in cooking. Veganism took care of eliminating the cholesterol, Dr. McDougall took care of eliminating the fat. I, however, will take credit for my brilliant elimination of processed syrup by replacing it with a date compote.
Last month, I made my first-ever trip to Farmer's Choice, a brand new produce store on Pico in Santa Monica. It is in the same shopping center as the Trader Joe's and it is absolutely amazing. The produce looks, feels, and tastes as fresh as a farmer's market, but it's also incredibly cheap. On my second visit, I managed to buy 90% of the weekly produce for 2 people, and it only ran me $17. From talking to the checkout girl, I learned that they get most of their produce shipped in daily and use local sources whenever possible.
I ran in there to pick up some raspberries, but ended up taking a "quick look" around. My quick look turned into an excuse to fill my basket with fresh fruits and vegetables, including some of the sweetest, softest dates I've had in a long time. I previously have sworn by the date lady at the Virginia Avenue Park farmer's market. However, I am switching my allegiance over to Farmer's Choice.

Tex-Mex Breakfast!

OK, so I probably talked a lot of shit about tex-mex breakfast when I found the recipe on the McDougall website. I probably continued to poke fun at it as I reworked the recipe. I continued to be a smart-ass even as we sat down and ate tex-mex breakfast. However, I was eating my words once I realized 1: it's delicious and 2: it's really, really good for you.
I made this breakfast a few weeks ago and substituted tofu for the brown rice recommended by the officiall McDougall recipe. Some members of my household can't really get behind the entire "rice for breakfast" idea.
On the day I took the picture, I may have undermined the entire "oil-free" concept by adding some crumbled vegan sausage. The reason behind the addition was pretty straightforward. I had the vegan sausage patties on hand from before I went on my McDougall bender, and didn't want to let it go to waste. I'm big on not letting things go to waste.

Brown Rice Pasta Primavera

Cooking with friends is always an enjoyable time and a great experience. I recommend it to anyone who is looking to pass a quiet night with good company and delicious food. The funny thing about cooking with friends is that sometimes you learn cooking techniques that stick with you forever. Whenever you use that technique, you naturally think of that person. Such is the case whenever I make pasta with broccoli. One night in college I made pasta with my friend Nathan, and he literally blew my mind when he told me that you could just drop broccoli into pasta during the last few minutes of cooking. Not only did it add a vegetable to the dish, it also saved a dirty pan. Lately I feel like my hands are a little dry, and I have attributed this to the number of dishes I have been doing. So, every time that I take the opportunity to save myself a pan and some trouble, I say a silent thank-you to Mr. Punwario(this is Nathan's college nickname that he would not want reprinted here).
Unlike most vegetables, there was never really a time when I hated broccoli. I attribute this to two things. First, my mom used to ply us with cheese-covered broccoli. Second, it was commonly used in pasta dishes. These two disguises allowed broccoli to slip undetected into my diet. The other day I found myself wanting something quick and delicious. It was nearing the end of the grocery week, but I had a bottle of Charles Shaw opened. Past the age of 22, Charles Shaw is never meant to be drank, and only acceptable as a cooking wine. So, I pieced together some things from my pantry with some things from my fridge and ended up with a magical little pasta dish that reminds me of cavatelli with broccoli. (Author's note: in New Jersey this would be pronounced Cah-vah-teal).

 Brown Rice Pasta with Broccoli

• 2 c. broccoli florets
• 2 c. mushrooms
• 1 clove garlic
• 1/2 c. white wine
• 2 TBSP lemon juice
• 1 c. brown rice pasta (dry measure)

1. Bring a pot of water to a boil. Meanwhile, chop the broccoli florets into bite-sized pieces, quarter the mushrooms, and mince the garlic.
2. When the water comes to a boil, add the pasta. Cook for about 5 minutes and then add the broccolli to the boiling water.
3. In a saute pan over medium heat, cook the garlic for one minute in a small amount of oil (just enough to not burn the pan).
3. Add the mushrooms and cook for 3 minutes. Add 1/2 a cup of dry white wine and lemon juice. Stir and continue to simmer over medium heat.
4. Drain the pasta and broccoli, add to the mushroom/wine mixture and simmer until the wine reduces (about 3 minutes).
5. Serve hot. You can sprinkle this with Italian Daiya, vegan Parmesan, or sun-dried tomatoes. Go crazy.

Sesame Stir Fry

I'm sitting in bed on a Saturday morning, listening to the Hold Steady because I am that cool, and wondering what I have to say about this stir fry. Usually when I post a recipe, I have some thoughts on society or the universe or some sort of personal ramblings to relate to my readers. I think they make me seem more human, and as I understand it, writers who seem more relate-able tend to sell more books (coming soon to a kindle/i-pad near you).
When I get down to it, this recipe didn't remind me of anything or anyone. I didn't have some sort of lightbulb moment. I don't even have an awful date story to go with it, since it just served as a weeknight dinner. I just had a bunch of tahini and a lot of spare vegetables lying around my apartment.
Stir-fry is always a good dinner option, since its premise is a simple one. Any time three or more vegetables are gathered in its name, the stir fry god is there. I like to sass mine up with tofu.
The real differentiating factor in any stir fry is which kind of sauce you mix it all with. I like peanut/sesame-based sauces a lot, but I have also been known to mix soy sauce and corn-starch and call it a day. There are a number of commercially-packaged stir fry sauces you can try if you are so inclined. For this stir fry, I decided on a sesame theme with tahini and sesame seeds.
wine pairing: Sam Adam's Summer Ale

Tofu

• 6 oz. firm tofu, cubed
• 2 TBSP. cornstarch
• 3 TBSP. vegetable oil

Stir Fry

• 1/4 a white onion, diced
• 2 cloves garlic, mined or pressed
• 1/2 a large carrot
• 6 medium mushrooms, quartered
• 2 c. broccolli florets cut into bite size pieces
• 2 heads of baby bok choy

Sauce

• 2 tbsp. tahini
• 2 tsp. soy sauce
• 2 tbsp. unsweetened grain milk
• 4 tbsp. water

1. In a small saucepan over medium heat, whisk together the grain milk with the tahini until it starts to thicken. Add the soy sauce and water, set to the lowest possible setting, and leave it to stay warm while you work on the stir fry.
2. Toss the cubed tofu with cornstarch to coat (think Shake n. Bake) and heat the oil in a wok over high heat. Add the tofu and toss to coat, cooking until it turns a light brown. 
3. Reduce heat to medium-high and add the onions, garlic, and carrots and cook until the onions are translucent. 
4. Add the mushrooms and cook a 2 minutes, until they start to sweat. 
5. Add the broccolli and cook for 2-3 minutes.
6. Stir in the bok choy and cook everything together for an additional 3 minutes.
7. Stir in the sauce and serve over rice or noodles and sprinkle with sesame seeds.

Tex-Mex Night

Let me take a few lines here to sing the many praises of the crockpot. The crock-pot slow cooker was first marketed in 1971 by Naxon. A crock pot is plugged into the wall and heats food by wattage, not temperature. As a result, liquid on the outside of the pot may lightly boil, but the food on the inside will be cooked slowly and deliciously. I love being able to throw a bunch of things into a crockpot in the morning and then come home to a delicious dinner. They are great for stews and sauces and chili.
I have a small crockpot that makes enough for 4 people, which is the perfect size for dinner one night and leftovers the next day. The center of my crockpot even comes out for easy cleaning. I have been known to cook something in my crock-pot, let it cool, refrigerate it over night, let it come to room temperature, and heat it the next day. I'm not sure how this is from a food safety perspective, but as a vegan I don't exactly need to worry about salmonella from my raw chicken, now do I?
Anyway, I threw together a recipe for vegetarian chili that came out quite good. I also made corn-bread muffins to go with it. My boyfriend doesn't like dry, crumbly corn-bread. In an effort to impress him, I set about making the moistest, sweetest cornbread I could come up with. Sometimes I have a tendency to overdo things, so the muffins came out tasting more like corn cupcakes. I will not be reprinting that recipe here, but I thought that inquiring minds would want to know about the muffins in the picture.

Oil-free Chocolate Pie

Going into the Great McDougall experiment, I knew that I had to be prepared with some serious dessert. Despite trying to give it up many times, I have come to the very simple conclusion that dessert is what makes dinner worth eating. It's something to look forward to at the end of a long day (that and an over-sized glass of red wine). Luckily, I found a great recipe on the McDougall forums and tweaked it to better suit my tastes and aversion to sugar.
 As you can see in the picture, I artfully arranged sliced kiwi and cherries on top of the pie. If I were Oprah, cherries would be on my list of favorite things. The pigment in cherries may reduce swelling and inflammation, plus they look really cute on rockabilly dresses and accessories. In all seriousness, I don't think I had ever eaten a non-maraschino cherry until a few weeks ago. I don't know how I went 25 years without them. I also don't know what I'm going to do when all of these fruits and vegetables stop being new to me. Maybe I'll have to start shopping the produce aisles of ethnic grocery stores?

Crab Cakes, Wut?

There are two things that I never say. First, I've never said I was a nice person. This gives me free reign to be mean when I have to and not be apologetic about it.The second is that I've never said I was a good cook. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy cooking and am always on the lookout for new things to try. Since going vegan, cooking has become one of my main hobbies and something that I enjoy doing with others as well. However, like yoga, soccer, and gymnastics, just because I enjoy doing something does not mean I am good at it.
Case in point. I had a real desire to make my own falafel. The Hungry Pocket, a falafel restaurant/juice bar in Santa Monica, has really amazing falafel. My co-workers grilled the owner about it and came back and reported that the falafel was indeed vegan, so I went down to try it out with them. They were delicious, that is for sure. On the other hand, I knew deep down that I was pigging out on a deep-fried ball of chickpeas. Since I am working on being more aware of fat in my diet, I wondered if I could make my own falafel in the oven, with just a little bit of oil brushed on top.
At any given time, I have about 3 or 4 different culinary schemes brewing in my head, just waiting for the perfect excuse to execute them. I decided to try out my falafel recipe for a picnic. I stuffed them in pita bread with lettuce, roasted tomatoes, and tahini.The idea was great, but the falafel was a little off. I tried a root-cause analysis, but wasn't able to put my finger on it. Luckily, Short Round (the sidekick to my culinary Indiana Jones) was able to put his finger on it. The cumin in the falafel made it taste more like Old Bay seasoning, therefore giving the entire thing the flavor of a crab cake.
So I am pleased to present my readers with my completely original, absolutely accidental recipe for vegan crab cakes.

Why Aren't All Donuts Just Vegan?

Recently, I went away to Vegas for the weekend, and I rounded out the trip with a stop at Ronald's Donuts, which is a Buddhist-run donut shop off of The Strip. While Vegas is not a great place to be a vegan, I wonder if most vegans who live there have thought of subsisting entirely off of these donuts. I almost surely would consider it if I were local. My favorite part of the entire experience was how much of an honest-to-goodness donut shop Ronald's was. There were no fancy pictures on the wall or bamboo napkins. They even used styrofoam cups (which I have a little bit of a problem with, but they were kitschy so I can get past that. If Ronald's were situated in LA, their bakery boxes would be emblazoned with their name and logo, there would be water features, and the display case would have been carefully lit and sparsely populated. Instead their case was teeming with donuts and the only decorative feature was an old man in the corner who just looked like he belonged in a donut shop.
This post brings up an important point that I like to make. There's healthy food, and there's vegan food, but the two are not always the same. In this case, these donuts were nearly undiscernable from "regular" donuts. That means they were full of sugar and fat, but it also means that it was a great way to enjoy true junk food without comprimising my ethical status. There are certain occassions in one's life that call for donuts, and dissapointment is one of them. Don't get me wrong, I had a great time in Vegas, it just wasn't all that I hoped it would be when I went out. Since misery absolutely loves company, and mild-dissapointment craves it, I recruited a friend with no sorrows (but an amazing metabolism)to help me conduct a very, very scientific taste test of Ronald's donuts.


The verdict:
By far the most amazing pastry had to be the bear claw, but the cinnamon roll was probably a close second. Their jelly donut was very good, but I would have liked a: a higher jelly to donut ratio and b: a more natural jam instead of a sugarfied gel. I also have to give a special shout-out to the apple fritter which, while being completely greasy and so heavy that I felt it the entire next day, was probably better than any apple fritter I have ever had. Since it's the only vegan apple fritter I've ever had, I feel like the Buddhists deserve a real round of applause.

3-Bean Tacos

I feel a little cheap posting this as a recipe, so please think of it as more of an idea for a cool way to assemble some ingredients and turn it into a reliable meal. To round it out and alleviate some of my Catholic guilt, I will give you a tip that I love using. When you have leftover tortillas, it's very exciting to make your own tortilla chips. Just cut the tortilla into triangles and spray very lightly with cooking spray. Broil on medium for about 2 minutes and then toss with salt and a squeeze of lime juice. Not only are they delicious, but they're also lower in fat than those greasy fried ones you'll get at any Mexican restaurant.

3-Bean Tacos
1/2 cup each kidney, black, and pinto beans
1 TBSP. chili powder
1/4 tsp. cumin
1/2 tsp. garlic salt
cheese, cilantro, and salsa to suit your tastes.
corn tortillas
This is a really easy recipe because all you do is drain and rinse the beans then cook them for about 5 minutes over medium heat with the spices. Spoon them into warmed tortillas and enjoy.